I never expected us to win the cup
That was always
inconceivable
But if we played to
our potential
The Quarter finals
were achievable
But when the first
ball was kicked
They were more
nightmare than dream
So I just wanted them
to do their best
Clearly too much to
ask of our team
The summer started oh so well
With a Euro football
banquet
Though sadly the home
nations
Were unable to attend
it
But the Euros inevitably
led
To the curse of footie
nations
The summer transfer
market
And the incessant
speculation
After the Euros came
Wimbledon
And I cheered on the
plucky brit
Then suffered our
inclement climate
While being bored by
the Cricket
I watched the windblown
whingers
Hacking round at the
British open
Then courtesy of the
highlights
I sat and watched it
all again
Then more newspaper
talk
Of who will stay and
who will go
Who is in and who is
out
And more stories about
Ronaldo
Two weeks away on the
costas
Helped to numb the
pain
Then home to more
paper talk
And of course more
summer rain
Even the upcoming
Olympics
Fail to give me
inspiration
Thinking of all that
track and field
Merely deepens my
depression
The only thing to break
my torpor
And to rejuvenated my
heart
Is to hear that shrill
whistle blow
And have the football
season start
Elin Woods admitted
Assaulting Tiger
“How many times”?
The police asked her
She thought for a
moment
"I’m not sure
exactly”
Then with a nod she
said
“Mark me down for a
three”
Are you wearing plus twos?
Well listen, here’s
the bad news
It looks as though the
plus twos
Have fallen out with
your shoes
England left for the airport
On the wrong bus,
apparently
For emblazoned on its
side was
“Playing with pride
and glory”
England’s bus was
possibly stolen
You will recognise it
quite easily
For emblazoned on its
side is
“Playing with sloth
and lethargy”
Me and some friends
Fancied a game of
darts
I said, “Nearest the
bull
To see who starts”
Johnny went “Woof”
And I went “Baah”
Then Danny went “Moo”
The beautiful game,
Is the life blood
Coursing through their
veins
These guardians,
These stewards and
rule makers
It fills their every
waking moment
On the other hand
They are:
Frauds
Interested in
Football
A little
Are you wearing running clothes?
What on earth are you
thinking?
You are in no shape
for running
What have you been
drinking?
I wasn’t born
yesterday you know
You’ve had more than a
tipple
You’ll be sorry I can
tell you
When you end up with
jogger’s nipple
Good bye Tommy
Celtics gentleman
Respected by professionals
Respected by the fans
Good bye Tommy
Celtic servant and
friend
A rock and pillar
Until your early end
Good bye Tommy
High in our esteem
The Celtic angels now
Have a new man on the
team
Tommy Burns Died May
15th 2008
The new England supremo
Mr Fabio Capello
Plans to take the England team
And fulfil our football dream
To raise English
spirits up
And win the next world
cup
But it would seem
This is just a silly
dream
As the only way Mr
Capello
The poor deluded
fellow
Will take a team as
far
As the finals in South
Africa
The only way he can
deliver
Is as the German team
coach driver
Are you wearing plus fours?
Well, they look just
the job
The tweeds with argyle
socks
But you do look like a
nob
