HARE COURSING

 

On the whole,

No pun intended,

It was a pleasant day

On the Golf course

The sun was warm

The wind was light

The golf was

A mixture of the sublime

And the ridiculous

A day of ups and downs

As my scorecard testified

But the par 4 15th

Was a different story

I had hit a crisp drive

From the elevated tee

And away it flew

Straight down the middle

As Bing once sang

It landed just short of the dog leg

Kicked to the right

And rolled perfectly round the turn

After such a shot

You feel ten feet tall

As you stride down the fairway

And I felt every inch of it

When I reached my ball

I found it sitting up invitingly

And with an unhindered path to the green

I had a birdie chance.

Slightly ahead and to the right

A rather large Rabbit,

Was enjoying the afternoon sun

Blissfully unaware of what was to come

I selected my club

And addressed the ball

“Just hit it straight”

I told myself

I swung the club towards the ball

In a perfect ark

But I must have lifted my head

Because there was an ugly contact

And the ball sliced away

In the direction of the Rabbit

Now had he just stayed still

He would have lived

But alas at the sound of the sliced contact

The Rabbit leapt vertically in the air

Straight into the path of the ball

And died instantly

Now looking back, I could have claimed

That the Rabbit put me off

But it didn’t really

If the ball had followed its path

I would have been out of bounds

So, the Rabbit sacrificed himself

To save my par

FIFA # 2

 

Guardians of the game,

Well respected,

Famed for their integrity

Their stewardship and

Honest endeavour

 

On the other hand

 

Few

In

Football

Agree

NICE ONE HENRY # 2

 

FIFA are on a mission

Disrespect for refs they want to defeat

An admirable ambition indeed

But first they need to stamp out cheats

Its spread from normal quarters

To Thierry Henry who to his ignominy

Handled the ball to keep it in play

An offence done quite deliberately

Which was compounded by his lie,

That it happened accidentally

TIGER, TIGER - CHOICES

 

Tiger Woods was undecided,

Iron or wood that was the quandary

Eventually he settled on

A Fire hydrant followed by a tree

DON CAPELLO - SOUTH AFRICA 2010

 

Don Capello spoke of the “Big Mistake”

And a big performance is his wish

But sadly, the outspoken John Terry

Will tonight be sleeping with the fish

BRITISH BULLDOG

 

Diego Maradona

He of the infamous

Hand of God

Has been savaged

By his new pet

The hound of God

FIFA # 1

 

Guardians of the game,

Holders of the purse strings

The doers of deals

Honest as the day is…..

 

On the other hand

 

Financially

Incongruous

Finagling

Acquiescence

LET’S SPLIT

I’ve always wanted to learn to do the splits

It’s an ambition since my earliest days

The guy at the gym said, “How flexible are you?”

I replied, “I can do any day but Tuesdays”

THE BEST MAN FOR THE JOB # 1

 

Rafa is staying at Anfield

So no new regime is brewing

There is no new job

That he is actively pursuing

And it’s a great relief

That no new club is wooing

The last thing Manchester wants

Is the prospect of Liverpool renewing

By employing a manager

Who actually knows what he’s doing

DRESSING UP

 

They are the supporters

Watching their team play

On terraces far and wide

Home and away

 

When flags are waved

They dress with pride

With painted faces

And deep joy inside

 

But when the whistle blows

And the dream is at an end

Tears stain the cheeks

As friend hugs friend

 

They dressed with a joy

That they wanted to express

But there is nothing sadder

Than sad fancy dress

HOWARDS END - SOUTH AFRICA 2010

 

Well England made it to the final

Though alas only the refereeing chap

But like the England team before him

Howard Webb was really crap