Tuesday, 8 March 2022

THE FOOTBALL ISN’T UP TO MUCH

 

The football isn’t up to much

We are all sensing doom

At half time the directors

Go off to the bored room

FOGHORN LEGHORN

 

Foghorn Leghorn

Was sent off the field today

The referee claimed

It was for persistent fowl play

BOFFINS ARE NOT THE SPORTY TYPE

 

Boffins are not the sporty type

But even a physicist called Bryan

Knows that he must exercise

Which he does by pumping ion

WHY CAN'T HOBO’S PLAY BASEBALL?

 

Why can't hobo’s play baseball?

At the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome?

Well, they say it’s nothing personal

It’s just that they can't find home

THERE REALLY IS NO TRICK TO IT

 

There really is no trick to it

The easiest way with no catch

To light up a football stadium

Is with a football match

OUR TEAM CAPTAIN TOOK TO THE FIELD

 

Our team captain took to the field

Carrying a piece of rope and the ball

Unconventional you might think

But he is the skipper after all

COACH JOSÉ MOURINHO

 

Coach José Mourinho

Likes to strut and preen

But doesn’t like to lose

And likes to cause a scene

He’s always crying foul

As he’s a real drama queen

ARE YOU WEARING SNOWSHOES?

 

Are you wearing snowshoes?

Blimey those things cost a packet

Hang on after closer inspection

Your snowshoe is a tennis racket

WHY CAN'T ORPHANS PLAY BASEBALL?

 

Why can't orphans play baseball?

At the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome?

Well they say it’s nothing personal

It’s just that they can't find home

WHEN I GO AND PLAY GOLF

When I go and play golf, there

Is something I’ve always done

I take a second pair of trousers

Just in case I get a hole in one

APPARENTLY NIGERIA IS NOW POLO FREE

 

Apparently, Nigeria is now polo free

So that’s deserves congratulations

But to be honest I didn’t think

They were one of the equestrian nations

IT WAS A BAD WINTER OLYMPICS

  It was a bad winter Olympics First it was the Luge I had a go at Then I found myself on thin ice Following some aggressive chat Th...