IF NANI WAS IN YOUR TEAM

 

If Nani was in your team

Would you enjoy his flare?

Well, I can tell it has its place

But he just shows off to be fair

STRIKER

 

A new striker was signed for united

And to make his debut he was invited

The manager spoke to the debutante

Uttering words of encouragement

“If your performance is not sublime

I’ll have to pull you off at half time”

The striker attempting to be witty

Said “we only got a cup of tea at city”

WE HAVE A GREAT WELSH INTERNATIONAL

We have a great Welsh international

Known affectionately as Griff

Well, when I say he’s Welsh

His parents once went to Cardiff

WE HAVE A MIDFIELD GENERAL # 2

 

We have a midfield General

Highly talented but temperamental

A hard working terrier

But on a bad day he’s just mental

I WAS DRIVING HOME AFTER THE MATCH

 

I was driving home after the match

Listening to the report on the BBC

It was described as a fascinating contest

Which surprised the hell out of me

Far from being an interesting match

It was the most boring thing you could see

VERY ECONOMICAL WITH THE BALL

 

Very economical with the ball

That is a quality worth merit

Our captain is only economical

As he’s too slow to get near it

PRIORITISING

 

Players perform elaborate routines

When goals are scored by my team

They must practise them for days

But I would prefer in many ways

That the celebration performers

Would practise defending corners

THE LEADER TOUCHED A BUOY

The leader touched a buoy

During the course of race,

When he got to the shore

His mother slapped his face

 

WE HAVE A MIDFIELD GENERAL # 1

 

We have a midfield General

Who’s really completive and hard

But everyone that we play

Just think he’s a dirty bastard

BERT TRAUTMANN

 

Goalkeeper Bert Trautmann

Was from a different age

When topflight players

Were not spoilt and pampered

He didn’t live in a mansion

Or have a selection of sports cars

To get to work on match days

From his home in Stockport

To Maine road in Manchester

He had to catch two buses

INDUSTRIALISED SPORT

 

Sport was industrialised by the Soviet Union

To promote communism

And not the money hungry capitalist west

But it profited capitalism